Monday, October 31, 2011

random thoughts


I miss blogging. I mean to really write, in a different way. Inspiration eludes me. Is it? Or is it just me?

I hope I have a special nook like Carrie in SATC, where she has a view of what… a building infront of her apartment or a little view of the city? Anyhow, I want to have that same kind of corner, but I want mine with a tree or a lake as my view. That’s nice, don’t you think? Me blogging while having coffee and listening to Norah Jones all at the same time. Hmm, I likey.
***
I am stressed. No I am burned out. I am tired. I feel sick. But I am happy :)
Weird that I have been feeling these all at the same time but I do. Burned out from work. Happy because of my relationships – with my family, friends, colleagues, most especially with my relationship with Stine.

I know I have not been very expressive with my feelings towards Mikoy but I do express it in words, through poems which I have been doing for several times now. Two in a row, imagine?! Probably, that is what I should be doing. Whenever I have things in mind, I should put it into writing agad so it won’t slip my mind.

Ours is not perfect but we try to keep it together. That’s what people in love should do di ba?
***
I had a busy day today. Drove to MOA then headed to Star City where we became kids again J It was tiring  but so much fun.

But, missed my Stinie today :)



Mahal Kita

mahal kita
alam mo ba?
sana maniwala ka
sa sinambit ng aking dila.

tignan mo aking mga mata
hindi dahil sa ako'y may muta
sa mata mo daw kasi makikita
totoong nilalaman ng puso. ok ba?

mahirap pala
minsang ipakita
lalo't nasaktan ka na
at puno ng pangamba.

huwag kang magalala
sasamahan kita
saan ka man magpunta
kahit madapa ka pa

ramdam mo na ba?
mahal na mahal kita
sasabihin ko pa ba?
ngayon alam mo na.

-for my mikoy
10-30-11

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

That's All That Matters

Its been awhile
Since my heart felt something like this
The first time I laid my eyes on you
It quickly sent butterflies on my stomach.

Your almond eyes
Those cute eyes with so many emotions
Makes my heart beats so fast
The moment it starts staring at me.

The first time your lips touched mine
It felt magical
Brings a shiver down my spine
And lactated my own being.

Those emotions I felt were premature
As days passed by it grew high like the giant sequioa tree
Exaggerated it may seem
But all true

It seems imaginable
Feeling something like this
Though not the first time
But this somehow is intense

I can think of a gazillion words
To describe how I feel
But after several years of being together
I still cannot think of a word that will explain it.

I LOVE YOU
That's all that matters
Today, Tomorrow
And Forever.

~For my MIKOY
10.26.11

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Jealousy



Recently talked to a friend. We were exchanging stories and then she told me something about jealousy. The funny thing was this person is not her partner. A close friend let’s say. Apparently, this friend sort of texting her blah-blah’s and my friend was like ‘duh, why are you acting that way?!’ to make the long story short, the friend of my friend seems jealous of the attention my friend is giving her “new apple of the eye.” I was smiling the whole time we were talking because I remembered something like that happened to me years ago :)


It is okay to be jealous at times. It comes out naturally, you cannot control it. The more you control it, the more it wants to get out from your system. We encounter people like this – they being jealous of the “new” people in our midst. They do act “foolishly” because they cannot figure out the true reason why they are acting that way that is why it contradicts to their statement. Probably too proud to even admit to themselves that they’re jealous because the “space” and “attention” being given to them was “shared” to the other person.


I guess that is also a classic sign that somehow the friend of my friend became somehow “emotionally dependent” on my friend. That is not bad, I think. That will only become a problem when the person acts differently instead of admitting the emotion and dealing with it. In their case, I was teasing my friend, told her that her friend is probably confused why she is feeling that way. If she realizes that friends feel that way too once in awhile and that’s not a taboo, she will understand. I was teasing her because the friend might have developed deeper feelings for her :)



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